Gunnite, Talladega and a Diver

So when we bought the farm it happened to come with this nice big pool. Except that it wasn’t exactly nice at the time. The pool was mostly empty, with some blackish water at the bottom, and live and dead creatures swimming and floating around. “It’s ‘Gunnite,'” our realtor proudly told us. But what she didn’t realize was that, having lived on .25 acres in Atlanta most of our adult lives, Mike and I had no idea what Gunnite even was. So later on we hire “Jon” the pool guy to show us the ropes and repair and take care of this cement pond. And one of the first questions I asked him was, “How long can we swim in it?” To which Jon replied, “Well, most folks around here close their pools at the end of the season.” To which I replied, “What season?” Then Jon looked at me like I was from outer space. “Race season,” he said flatly. And, as if that wasn’t bad enough, I had to go and ask, “What race season?” By this point, Mike’s about to slap me because even he knows that much of the world turns around here by Talladega — Superspeedway, that is. (And yes, like you, I too saw “Talladega Nights” but just hadn’t made the connection yet.) “Ohhhhhh,” I said to Jon. “Of course! We’ll close the pool then.” Now, fast forward a few weeks and everything’s going along fine with the pool except that it has a small leak in it and we don’t know where it is. Every time we leave and come back the pool is 2/3 full. “We can send a diver in,” Jon informed Mike. “A diver?” I later ask. “There are people who do that for a living here?” Well, apparently there are. So next month, we’re hosting a diver at our pool — after the “season” ends. Pray he finds the damn leak. Then hopefully next year, we’ll host some of you for a pool party! Oh, and for the record: the Talladega season ends Nov. 1 with The Mountain Dew 250 Fueled by Fred’s. Ha. I catch on quick.

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